TOP 10 WAYS TO BE THE FUNNIEST GUY IN YOUR OFFICE
10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath, even if they
don't, and then punch them in the face.
9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After everyone gives the
sympathy remarks, tell everyone you were joking and call them a bunch of
wankers.
8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard. In the meeting,
pretend you're hacking up a greenie, spit it into a glass and hand it to the
person next to you and say "BEAT THAT".
7. Inform a male colleague that he would make a great rent-boy, then
piss in his coffee and tell him he needs a good shag up the arse.
6. Always walk around with a big smile on your face and one hand down
the front of your trousers.
5. Answer every question with "Fucked if I know...", then call the
person a racial slur that doesn't even match their colour.
4. Brag about the fact that you carry a gun.
3. Run around the office with your dick out spraying piss everywhere and
yelling "It wont stop! God help me it wont stop!" Then when it does,
look down and go "Oh!"
2. Ask to borrow a colleague's expensive pen - take it to the toilet and
stick it up your arse - return it to the person and tell them that it
smells bad and tell them to smell it- when they say that it smells, say:
"It should - I had it up my arse"
1. Have a crap on your office floor and, when someone comes in and sees
it, tell them it's the fake rubber kind. When they try to pick it up and
realise their hand is full of real **** - laugh and embarrass them in
front of everyone.
